2 Major Benefits of Moving

Life is never more stressful than when you are planning to move. It seems like no matter how much we try to plan and organize, something always goes wrong. When the inevitable does finally happen we are left with 2 choices; forget the plan and stay where you are, or charge forward and take risks.

Pedro and I have decided to take the risk. 

Pedro is always saying, "there is no growth in comfort." I completely agree with him, which is why our family is moving from Puerto Rico...

 to Raleigh, North Carolina. 

We want to embrace the challenge and find new opportunities to grow as a family, as well as individuals.

Honestly, moving is exciting, but not all that fun. When the stress seems too overwhelming, it can help to remember the 2 major benefits of moving.

1. A chance to start over - there are very few times we are allowed to restart in life. If you are blessed enough to have such a chance take full advantage of it. Create fresh beautiful memories and allow yourself to be the person you've always wanted to be.

2. Problem Solving skills - This one was meant to be a little bit of a joke. If you have ever moved, you get it. There is no better example for Murphy's law than moving. You think you have it all figured out, but sooner or later you'll find yourself blindsided by something you didn't expect. Thankfully, you learn how to think on your feet!

Good luck to every brave soul who is also making an important life transition this year. Focus  on the outcome of the journey and the process becomes much easier!

New Year, New Inspiration!

Welcome to 2016! 

 

With the new year comes new motivation and new inspiration! This year is going to bring a variety of projects for me, and I hope it will bring lots of projects for you as well.

So many things happened last year that pushed me to grow in almost every aspect; this year I feel like I can do anything! Let's analyze; think about the struggles and impossible situations that you overcame in 2015. If you got through that, you can literally do or be anything you want. I realized 2 important things:

1. You don't need to be a professional to do what you love - We can't let the fact that we aren't "qualified" hold us back from our passions, because practice makes perfect. I used to be under the impression that a short film had to be this magnificent work of art, and that discouraged me from making movies. But I got tired of waiting for inspiration to strike, and I started making little videos to work on the technical side of my craft. If you love something don't wait until someone gives you permission. Just go for it!
2. Hard work, passionate work, always pays off - Passion can leak into to everything you do. When you try your best at something because you love it, the right people will notice and things will take off for you! And even if no one ever notices, the satisfaction of finishing a task that you know you put 110% of your best efforts into is indescribable. 

Maybe I am a little ambitious to be taking this on, but I feel like if I stick to it and work hard, I will succeed. One of those projects is to start a YouTube channel. It's time to take the time to practice my craft. So I started out already with a couple short videos...

my short film...

  

and a new trailer for my book!

 Soon I will also be posting irregular Vlogs documenting our transition from Puerto Rico to Raleigh.

(Stay tuned!)

The point is 2016. 

It is the year of inspiration, motivation, and new challenges! 

Forget about a new year's resolution! 

Set goals and make yours dreams happen! 

 

Build Your Own Doors!

 

All throughout my life I was always told to be mindful of open doors. My parents and teachers told me to keep my eyes and ears alert because opportunities are everywhere. As a result, I did my best in school to make sure that when those opportunities presented themselves, I might be "the chosen one." However, through my experience I have realized how unproductive that way of thinking is. 

We should always strive to be our best, but because everyone is so different, my best is not the same as your best, which creates advantages in certain situations. But me being better than someone at something doesn't necessarily mean that I am more deserving than them, or vice-versa. 

If given the chance I feel that we can ALL be great at doing what we love. Not only that, but we can actually make our dreams a reality without having to rely on anyone but ourselves!

You will be surprised how successful you can be by asking yourself 3 simple questions:

STEP 1: What do you want? - The problem that most people face is confusion and indecisiveness. We don't have what we want because we have no idea what we want! When you are wading through life with no general direction, you are at least 3 times as likely to be disappointed in old age. The first major decision you must make is how you want your life to turn out, or what kind of things you want to achieve. 

STEP 2: How can you get it? - Once you know what you want to do, the next task would be creating a plan of action. This is usually where people give up. It is common to think that you are too poor, or not smart enough, or not skilled enough to do what you wish you could. I am here to tell you that there is always a way around a road block, and there is always an advantage to every situation. Over the summer when I had free time because I was not in school, I saw that as an opportunity to write a book. When I had the miscarriage, I saw my experience as an opportunity to share my story with other women passing through a similar experience in hopes of offering them support. When it comes to making a plan of action, the key word is PERSPECTIVE. If you have a positive open minded perspective, it becomes easier to find a path to your destiny, no matter your circumstances. 

STEP 3: What does life look like now that you have it? - After you know what you want, and how you are going to get there, the next component is visualizing it. I recommend spending 15 minutes to an hour each day imagining what your life will be like once you are living up to your true potential. If you dream of traveling the world, but you lack the finances, find a way to travel on your budget (absolutely possible with so many resources available to us) and then visualize yourself on an airplane, or in front of the Eiffel Tower. Its like daydreaming on steroids! The mind is a powerful thing, not to be underestimated, that can make our life as amazing as we imagine it to be, with a little elbow grease of course. 

The sky is the limit! 

The only one who determines if you fail or succeed is YOU!

5 Lovely Ways to Celebrate LOVE

Love comes in many forms. It can be romantic, platonic, familiar, religious, or directed at the self.

Despite popular belief, one can celebrate this love EVERY DAY and in many different ways! 

=) With friends - This is always one of the most fun! Who says love has to be about romantic one-on-one occasions? Cheers to the people who are getting together with a few friends to have a good time! Spread the platonic love with little goody bags filled with candy! Nothing says I appreciate your friendship quite like chocolate.

 

<3 With significant other - You can take the traditional route and have a nice date with that "special someone." Get all dressed up and have dinner and watch a movie! I hear Jupiter Ascending was good. Try springing for a thoughtful or practical gift, something they can use for a while that will remind them of you!

>:) With family - They may drive you crazy, but at the end of the day you care a lot about your family. There is nothing wrong with spending the day with your parents, or with your children (pets count). There is no love more pure than that! The smiles of your toddler when you get to their favorite park will be well worth the trip. The laughter of your loved ones is better than any material present on Earth!

;) Alone - If you find yourself by yourself and maybe feeling a little down, stop those lonely thoughts right now! STOP! If you are going to find love you must first learn to love you! So today is a good day to get a manicure and a massage. Or get your favorite take out and watch all your favorite movies!

+ With Christ - When you think about it, there is no greater love than Christ has for his church,why not celebrate that? Dedicate part of your day to reading your bible and praying and then maybe find a way to volunteer. Jesus' second command was "Love your neighbor as yourself." 

Above all, remember the most important commandment given:

As I have loved you, love one another. John 13:34

3 Ways to Renew Your Love

Here you are with you significant other after a few years. 

You love each other dearly, but it seems like all you ever do together is stress and worry, even though life is made a little bit easier when you have someone to help you figure out how to live so that you both get the most out of the gift God has blessed us all with. 

The problem is that most of the time this gift of life doesn't seem much like a blessing at all.

After the bills are paid, the homework is done, the kids are asleep, and you've had dinner, you tend to lay down feeling more achy than you did when you woke up. 

As time passes, we all find ourselves burning out. The passion and lust that once consumed couples in the beginning of their relationship fades to a more necessary and secure form of love. Before you know it, you are in bed by ten reading together like those married couples in the movies and on TV. 

 

And all too soon, life is hum-drum and you feel, dare I say it, OLD. 

If only there were a time machine that could at least show you what you used to do for fun.

While we cannot avoid the inevitability of getting older, we CAN do things that make us feel young again, and we can do them with our significant other. Doing exciting new things together, and maybe a few harmless things you used to do, can renew love in a powerful way! 

Here is how:

1. Take Each Other Back - Once, long ago, you used to do something extra special for your significant other. You would buy her chocolates once a week, you would call him during your lunch break at work just to hear his voice, you always used to make breakfast together and sit down for a coffee. My recommendation is that you chose one of those things to do again! It doesn't have to become a consistent habit again (though it would be nice if it did) but a sweet gesture like that will make you remember and cherish the Puppy Love that brought you to where you are today! 

 

2. Teach Each Other Something New - In the beginning of our relationship, my husband Pedro was an avid skateboarder, and he was (and still is) very talented. Not only was it sexy when he would show off by doing tricks that his friends couldn't, but he would actually step off of his board to teach me how to ride; it was a HUGE turn on. In turn, back when he was not a Christian yet, I began taking him to church and teaching what I knew about Jesus and the bible. Those special moments that we spent together are priceless memories that we all have! They may not exactly be the same, but there was a time when you stepped out of your world into his/hers, and it was exhilarating! Recreate one of those memories, or make new ones! 

3. Fall in Love Again - I recently read an article that stated that love is a choice we make and that any two people can fall in love. The theory is that by asking a series of questions, 36 to be exact, in a romantic setting, a couple could create nonsexual intimacy and establish trust that would eventually grow in to respect and admiration. Begin a series of dates based around this theory. There are 3 sets of questions, so it  would take 3 romantic dates; for example a picnic in the park, a dinner out or in, making brunch together, going for a scenic drive, etc. You can even turn this into a craft by writing down the questions on decorated note cards! What do you have to lose? You're already in love, so this exercise could only push you deeper in your bond. Remember to ask the question even if you think you already know the answer, your partner may just surprise you! 

 

5 Simple Steps for Shaking Off The Funk

 Many of us are probably feeling a little burnt out by now. The holidays are over and all of those happy Christmas feelings are long gone. The motivation we had to achieve our New Year's Resolution has dissipated, and we are back to the same tired routines of the year before. 

Those are just a few of the many causes of the build up of negative emotions that make up what I like to call The Funk. 

It is not quite as easy to overcome as the Winter Blues, and it is not as intense as depression, but it certainly is unpleasant. The Funk has a variety of symptoms including lack of interest, body soreness, apathy, fatigue, and a general hopeless feeling that nothing will ever make you smile again. 

A common belief is that the cure to The Funk is finding happiness. I don't think that is accurate. Yes, happiness can relieve some of those symptoms for a while, but it is a fleeting feeling that eventually wears off. Soon you will find yourself looking for the next happy high to pull you above the surface just long enough to catch a few deep breaths.

There is a more permanent solution to eliminate The Funk for good and I believe that solution is finding the joy within you. Joy runs deeper than happiness. It is a lasting emotion that leads to inner peace and psychological rest.

According to dictionary.com the definition of joy is the emotion of great delight or happiness caused by something exceptionally good or satisfying; keen pleasure; elation.

What if I told you that "something exceptionally good or satisfying" could be found in your own mind? 

Many times, the key to lasting joy is trapped in our thoughts, but can be brought out by following a simple defunkification  process. 
(Yes I just made up a word)

 DeFUNKification:
 

Step 1: Kill all incoming negative thoughts. It is much more simple than it sounds. Whenever you have a thought that produces a discouraging emotion, counter it with a thought that produces a positive emotion. For example, if you are mentally putting yourself down for not sticking with you resolution, challenge that by remembering a time when you actually did follow through with something. Consider how good you felt and remember that one failure in no way defines who you are.

Step 2: Get some fresh air. It may be cold out there, but being inside, staring at the same walls you've been staring at for weeks, months, or even years, can be depressing. So is browsing Facebook, stalking people who are enjoying their lives more than you happen to be at the moment. Go for a walk and take 10 deep breaths. Every time you inhale, imagine yourself sucking up a bit of your Funk, and every time you exhale, imagine yourself letting it out. 

Step 3: Occupy yourself. Chose a few new goals; pick something long term and then plan a short term goal that will help you achieve the long term one. Get a new hobby, maybe something that you have always wanted to do. Plan an exciting vacation to a new country and learn a new language to help you prepare! Some times we can fall in to The Funk because our spirit is telling us that we are not making progress. Human beings are meant to do amazing things! If you are doing the same thing as last year, something's gotta give. 

Step 4: Take a break. You are back to school, the Christmas decorations at work have come down, and life is pretty much back to business as usual. So take a break from life. If you can afford to take a mini weekend vacation do that, but taking a break doesn't have to mean going away. If you have a flexible schedule, try taking a nice comfortable nap in the middle of the afternoon! If you are shackled to consciousness by your responsibilities, make time before going to sleep at night to get wrapped up in an exceptionally good book. (I recommend Liars Like Me by yours truly!)  

Step 5: Count your blessings. I mean this in the most literal sense. If you tried everything on this list and you are still trapped in the suffocating fog of sadness, start to make a list of your own. We all know that life is unfair, and, if we are being honest, we tend to realize that fact even more when we are not enjoying it. Life kicks you when you are down, so the best thing to do is get up as quickly as possible. On a piece of paper start to write down things that you are truly grateful for, even if it was a long time ago. Better yet, start a blessing jar, or jug, or bowl; pretty much any empty container you have around the house will work for this. Everyday write down something that you are grateful for, or a blessing that you have experienced and put it in the jar. If you can't think of one, start with the fact that you are alive and able to read this post! 

 

New Year, New You!

 

The new year is sure to bring big changes for all of us. Usually, during this time of year we reflect on what our life has been like over the past 12 months in attempts to better ourselves; to prepare for the next big step. Whether it's remorse over not eating healthier, or exercising more, or spending too much money, we all admit that there is something we can improve. 

So, year after year we set a New Year's resolution. And after only a few short months  many of us find ourselves breaking it.

Getting off to a good start is no problem at all, maintaining that passion you had in the beginning is what some of us find difficult. Auspiciously, there are a few key tricks to staying on track!

1. Make a list of motives - On a sheet of paper, write out all of the reasons behind setting your New Year's resolution. Will it make you happier, healthier, or wiser? Will it bring your family closer together? Knowing the "why" will keep you motivated enough to try!

  
2. Tell everyone you know -This all boils down to one word; accountability. The more people you tell about your resolution, the more people are going to expect to see results. So, post it on Facebook, Twitter, Pinterest, MAKE IT KNOWN! When you have a little slip, and you feel like backing down, you will be surrounded by friends who can encourage you to give it another try. 

3. Overcome the obstacles - Figure out what is standing between you and your goal, and then make a step by step plan on how you are going to jump over that hurdle. Most times, there is an easy solution for monumental problems. If you cannot find the answers on your own, ask one of those wonderfully supportive people you told for help.

4. Reward yourself - Treat yourself every time you take a step towards victory! You deserve to indulge every now and then, especially when you do something that makes you proud! Have a scoop of ice cream, or go see that movie you've been dying to watch, or  buy that nice sweater you've had your eye on.

5. Picture it - The most powerful way of achieving a goal is to visualize your success! Imagine yourself in that smaller size, or studying at that college, or in that new car! The more you think about it happening, the more likely it is to ACTUALLY happen!  

Most importantly, don't let ANYONE stop you from being a better version of yourself!

 

Much Needed "Me Time"

This time of year has to be one of the most stressful of all. On top of everything else you normally do, add making lists of things to get people, shopping for hours, cooking for hours, extra holiday cleaning, and so on for what seems like forever! 

I don't know about you, but all of the additional little tasks have me pretty tightly wound. It can be more difficult than ever to find time for yourself, to relax, which makes it more important than ever! Sleep is simply not enough anymore, as I find myself waking up sore and stiff.  

In order to feel better throughout the day we have to focus on establishing a time of rest for our bodies and souls. 

Fortunately there are 3 minor things that we can do to keep our batteries fully charged!

1. Devotional first thing in the morning - What is the first thing that comes to mind when you wake up in the morning? Usually, a long list of things you have to get done! What if, you turned off those automatic reminders, and tuned in to the Lord? Instead of casting all of those burdens and worries on to your own shoulders, remember that God is present and in control of EVERY situation. He cares about the things that trouble us throughout the day! Upon waking up, pray, and ask him to help you to relax, because He has it all in His capable hands. I like to use the YouVersion Bible App because it has endless devotions to help you listen to, and become aware of what God is trying to tell you today; which is far more important than what you will have for breakfast.

2. Stretch!!! - As I mentioned before, I have recently found myself waking up in worse shape than I was in when I went to sleep! The stresses of work, home life, and these end-of-year holidays have finally caught up to me. As a result, I found relief in an extremely mild daily exercise. If yoga is not your thing (it is definitely NOT mine) stretching works just as well! I found a video that works for me on YouTube; it is the first thing I do after my time with the Lord and it has gradually been loosening my tight muscles! 

3. Do something mindless - No, I don't mean go out and do something crazy and reckless just because you can! By mindless, I mean, do something that does not required much though or concentration, something that makes you feel good! I like to buy a cheap fun color of nail polish (97 cents for NYC Color at Walmart) to do my nails. It is easy, relaxing, and it forces me to stop for a minute to recollect my tranquility. It also makes me feel pretty! If you don't like to do your nails, pick your favorite song and listen to it without doing anything else. Close your eyes, and enjoy yourself!

 

When life gets overwhelming take a few steps back, and a couple hundred deep breaths! 

Things always get better!

Being A Better You!

It is no secret that there is always room for improvement, and that goes for everyone. Sure, you might be successful and you might "have it all", or you might be a loser and have nothing; no matter who you are there are ways to turn yourself in to the person you have dreamed of being!

1. Read more! Studies show that people who read more have an easier time learning new things and setting large goals for their lives. That's right, readers are dreamers! Read more articles, magazines, newspapers, fiction, anything really. Also, readers are less likely to develop brain deteriorating diseases, such as Alzheimer's, in their old age. Apparently, one page a day keeps the doctors away!

 

2. Have one conversation a day that is NOT centered on you. The world does not revolve around any single person. The next time you talk to someone, try listening to him or her. Learn about their life and be excited for their accomplishments, or learn about what troubles them and offer productive solutions that can help them. One of the best ways to help you is by helping others! Not only will it make you feel good to show this person that you actually care, but also they are likely to return the favor!

3. Drink a glass of water first thing in the morning. The Japanese have recently let the world in on a secret! It seems that drinking a glass of water first thing in the morning has all kinds of amazing benefits! Aside from all of the health reasons, it put people in a better mood in general. Those of us who are not morning people will find ourselves surprisingly energized and, dare I say, HAPPY! When your body is feeling good, it will let you know by lifting your spirits. 

 

4. Set goals for yourself. In reality, everyone should set goals for themselves everyday, but at least once a week is good enough. The best kind of goal will help you reach an overall bigger goal later in the month or year. It could be anything! Think about what you would like to achieve and then make a clear path on how you are going to get there, and tell someone about it. Don't brag; just let them know what you have in mind so that someone will be there to hold you accountable. 

5. Make a budget. "I would be happy if only I could afford..." I hear that all the time, but here is something I bet you never considered. If you set and follow a budget you can afford literally anything you want. However, it usually takes a little while to get there, which is where most people drop the ball. Patience is truly a virtue. Good things come to those who wait!! 

6. Eliminate all excuses in your life. This one is perhaps the hardest of all. It takes training because we complain about and make excuses for everything. I was late because..., I didn't wake up early because..., I don't eat better because..., you get the idea. Simply stop using the words BUT and BECAUSE. If you are late, you are late, it doesn't really matter why does it? This will encourage you to find solutions for your behavior flaws instead justifying them. 

 

7. Be polite. For some reason, especially with our generation, common courtesy flies over most people's heads. It's like they don't understand the concept of "please" and "thank you." A nice smile goes a long way, and so does a simple compliment. I'm not saying you should walk around sucking up to people, but you should at least do you best to be nice. Try to remember the golden rule, teach it to your kids even: Treat other the way to want to be treated! 

Mommy & Me Monday!

Happy Monday everyone! 

In case you're having a bad day, hopefully this fun special tradition can make you smile! 

Don't forget to have a special Mommy & Me moment with your little one today!

Then...

Now!!!